


It Never Ends

by orphan_account



Category: The Yogscast
Genre: Portal AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-09
Updated: 2015-11-09
Packaged: 2018-04-30 18:16:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5174237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's easy to test portals alone, but a companion always helps with the boredom.</p><p>(Yep, it's a Portal AU that I cut short. Oops.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	It Never Ends

"Good morning. You have been in suspension for three one zero six eight days. This courtesy call is to inform you that all test subjects are to report to the Extended Relaxation Chamber Hub for immediate breifing. Good luck."

Will groaned.

It was testing day. It was testing day and after three decades of sleep, Will still felt tired. Sheets rumpled as Will stretched, his long-unused muscles slowly rousing. He sat up, rubbing his eyes, and sighed.

He wasn't ready for testing. In a few minutes, he would have to face an endless array of polished white chambers, each of them designed to appear just as unendingly insipid as the next, and all for just a few measly dollars, too- such a consolation prize. Maybe after all of this testing business was over, he could buy his sanity back. 

Slowly Will pushed himself off the bed, landing on tottering legs- leave it to extended animation to make him almost forget how to walk. He took a few uncertain steps forward before managing to find his rhythm, steady and cautious.

The room jerked, causing him to stumble and his stomach to lurch. Wobbling, furniture struggled to stay upright, as anything resting on top slid off. A clock crashed to the ground next to Will, a few bits of interior electronics scattering across the floor. He guided himself along the wall to the bathroom, avoiding a fallen painting or two before hastily bursting in and throwing up in the toilet. Just splendid.

Leaning back, Will tried to quell the sick feeling in his stomach, to little avail. He shakily stood up and attempted to flush the toilet, but just like everything else at Aperture Science, it didn't work. The cheapskates. He'd have to give them a piece of his mind once he finished testing- if he survived that.

He scanned the room. Nothing caught his eye but the mirror across from him. He looked like shit. Will's hair was a mess, his face was tired and pale, and he had on that ridiculous orange jumpsuit that he was forced to wear, not to mention that an ashen layer of dust had settled over him. He turned on the faucet and watched, amazed, as a slim trickle of water poured forth. Finally, something helpful. He splashed his face and ran his wet fingers through his blond hair, achieving something of a hair style. It would have to do for now.

The room started forward again, knocking Will onto the linoleum floor with an undignified "oomph." His nausea returned tenfold as he fought the urge to vomit. The suite swayed back and forth as it coasted along, forcing Will to hold onto the counter to keep from sliding around the washroom floor. A sudden crash sent him towards the wall, his back colliding painfully. Groaning, Will rose and left the bathroom.

Even after all that motion, the bedroom was mostly intact, excusing most of the furtinure that was strew about the suite. He plodded towards the exit and threw open the wooden door. 

He looked down through the hole in the wall the room had created. Thirty feet below him, he could see the hub, empty. 

"Hello?" Will called out, his voice echoing throughout the abandoned room.

No answer.

He yelled again, "Could anybody help me get down from here?"

Far off, he thought heard something shouted in return. A minute later, a young man ran out from a reception area on the other side of the hub, clad in that same orange jumpsuit that Will had been forced to wear, waving his arms about in order to get Will's attention.

Will cleared his throat. "How do I get down from here?"

"Just drop down."

"Uh, I'm not too sure about that. I'd rather not die..."

The man rolled his eyes. "Just come on, you pussy- jump!"

Will started, his face turning pink. "I am not a pussy!"

"You are such a pussy. Won't even jump."

"Because I'd DIE!"

The man sighed. "You have the fall boots, you know."

Will looked down at his feet. He had forgotten about the white and black shoes. Had he really slept with them on? Weird.

"So, uh, do I just fall, or what?"

"Just jump down. As long as you land on your feet, you should be fine... I think."

"You THINK?! Oh God." Will hesitated. He really didn't want to do this, but he didn't really have any other options, unless the guy had a crane. Why he would have a crane, Will didn't know.

"Okay, so, uh, on the count of three?"

"Just fucking jump already!"

"Okay, okay, I will. Just give me a second. I just need to-" The suite jerked forward again, throwing Will out with an undignified scream. He dropped onto the white cement, his boots clicking at the impact. Will made a mental note to thank Aperture Science for not killing him yet.

He rose from the kneeling position the boots had coerced him into and surveyed his surroundings. Not far away was the reception area that the man had come from and a few small doors. Everywhere else was clean and empty, except for the suite Will had fallen from.

The young man laughed as Will turned to face him. "Finally! I thought you would never get down from there."

"You weren't helping."

"Whatever. I'm Parv." He stuck out his hand expectantly, beaming at Will.

Taking it, he replied, "Will; nice to see somebody here. So, uh, where is everybody? I don't imagine it's Christmas or anything, right?"

Will chuckled at his own joke while Parv shrugged.

"No idea. You're the first person I've seen so far. I've been looking in the hallways behind the reception desk, though. Come on, I'll show you."

Parv took Will's hand and sprinted, leaving Will to try to not get dragged along. Parv hopped over the desk, forcing Will to execute a terrible attempt at a repeat, knocking the pens and clipboards covering the desk onto the cold floor.

After coursing through a few abandoned hallways, Parv began to slow down, releasing Will from his vice-like grip. The fluorescent lighting made the monochrome offices appear almost haunting, the papers and electronics scattered about making each step just as terrifyingly noisy as the last. Will was glad that Parv was here with him; he wouldn't have been able to take the oppressive atmosphere alone. They began to search the empty rooms.

After a few minutes of snooping around the offices, Parv cried out, "Will, look!"

"What is it?" Will walked over to find an ecstatic Parv inside an observation room.

Parv pressed his face against the glass, smiling. "It's two of those portal guns! We can use them to get out of here."

"How? I don't really think we can get down there; that glass is probably impossible to break."

"Awww, really?" Parv whined as he pushed away from the window.

"Yeah, sorry. I doubt they'd risk the glass hurting someone."

Parv sighed. "But, they're Aperture Science- you know how cheap they are!"

Will shrugged. "Well, they made these fall boots decent enough. Maybe they did the same with the windows."

Smirking, Parv raised a finger. "Only one way to find out."

Before Will could stop him, Parv picked up a chair laying on the floor and lobbed it at the glass, sending pieces of the shattered window flying. Clear shards cut at their skin, scratching them, thankfully only lightly.

Parv giddily let out a "yay" while Will cursed loudly. 

"Parv! You can't just throw stuff around like that! You're going to get hurt!"

"Whatever Grumpypants, let's go get those portal guns!"

Parv dropped down into the test chamber, unfazed by the cuts on his skin, leaving Will to cautiously jump down and follow him. Picking up the nearest device, Parv twirled it around, smiling like a madman.

"Be careful with that thing. We just want to get out, okay?" Will carefully picked the other gun, then inspected the white room.

The exit door sat high above them on a small platform, easily accessible with the portal guns, but what else would you expect in the first chamber? 

Will shot one portal in front of him and another on the ceiling above the platform, and jumped in. Easy. Parv quickly followed behind him.

"So, uh, we should probably just go along with the tests for now. They'll probably lead us out of here, so we can find out where everyone's gone."

Parv shrugged, then walked through the exit and into the waiting elevator with Will.

"Thank you for completing Test Chamber Zero One. You will now proceed to Test Chamber Zero Two. Good luck."

Just a few more tests. Just a few more tests and they were free.

**Author's Note:**

> Uh... yeah, that happened. I got the urge to write this after reading the joke prompt "imagine your OTP fucking with portals" and misinterpreting it as "imagine your OTP derping around with portals." Good job me!


End file.
